Not Free to Give



A phrase which rings again and again in my mind

Which I'm still trying to connect with some kind

Of vision - which makes sense to me as I consider

All the different ways it can be interpreted, to infer



Multiple definitions are all too readily apparent

Is an idea which boggles my mind with its intent

"Not free" implies there is another who's taken over

And this means the end's come, for another lover



Has walked into her life and taken over my place

If this is so, then those long days spent in embrace

Will never again be shared with me, as I won't share

Unless it's apparent and quite obvious she still cares



But the "giving" part is what so completely baffles me

For this implies "giving" was required to give, to be

Part of the life I shared with her over four months

But it just isn't so, and she knows that, in trumps



For we shared so completely everything we had

Without any concept of "giving" for we were glad

To SHARE what each of us had within our souls

Coming from love and caring, not anything sold



And now the phrase turns around, spinning in my head

As I try and equate it with everything else which has sped

Along on a fast express train going from place "A" to "B"

And I know now what we were - we can never again see ...



- Tristram



Christopher W. Thomas

10:15am Friday Feb. 13th, 1998



[web down earlier]