Subject: An Explorer of Distinction
From: Christopher W. Thomas (creatician@poetic.com)
Host: 209-150-40-113.s113.tnt1.spg.ma.dialup.rcn.com
Date: Thurs May 20, 1999 at 4:55PM

An Explorer of Distinction


On this day in fifteen hundred and six
A legendary Italian explorer hit the bricks
After a life full of extraordinary adventure
Christopher Columbus died quite poor*...

After making a deal with Spain's Queen Isabella and Ferdinand
To keep a tenth of all precious metals found in the new lands
As well as to become viceroy of all the territories he located
Columbus would come to be - in a sense ... castrated ...

For, even though he made four voyages west from Spain
As a governor of the new lands, he was pretty lame
Chris Columbus's forte was search and discovery
But the Spanish government desired recovery

And so, even though the man found the New Land ...
(At least - Puerto Rico ... even tho' it's not the main stand)
He just couldn't handle the demands of bureaucracy
And so, when he died ... his status was one of mediocrity ...

- Tristram

Christopher W. Thomas
2:30pm Thurs, May 20th, 1999

The Four Voyages, and Touchdowns:
1
Guanahani (later, Watling Island, in the Bahamas)
Juana (Cuba)
Espanola (Hispaniola)
aka Haiti/Dominican Republic
2
The Leeward Islands
Dominica
Guadeloupe
Antigua
Puerto Rico
Jamaica
3
Trinidad
Venezuela
Margarita
4
Honduras
Panama

[And he never did find the way to Asia]

* According to The New York Times
(Other sources indicate Columbus
to have been "quite wealthy"
at the time of his death.)