Hole in Heart



The body is willing, and so is the mind

But now there has been a whole new kind

Of obstacle to the life which has been mine

An ending of the sharing which has made blind



My eyes - to the point of closing my mind off

To the wonder which is deep in my soul's laugh

Which imbued me with such an absolute sense

Of words and thoughts which did so well blend



As I found new peace within my complete frame

Which led me to new dimensions - some tame

And then you came into my life and pulled me

Making me shift gears and merge into your sea



Of delight - which engaged me time after time

As I won you and filled you with my hot rhyme

Words and motions blended so well at first

There was warmth and beauty without thirst



But as it evolved and you spent more time away

The beauty we were immersed in tones of gray

And the wonderful way we shared so much passion

Became tinged with pain as it went out of fashion



For you saw only the pain in your body and heart

And I felt the tightness grab me and color my art

I wanted so to reach out and pull you tightly to me

But you could not budge for the effort made you bleed



And then you casually informed me now there'd be no "us"

Boring a hole in my heart thru which you could drive a bus

And here I sit wondering how and where we went so far wrong

So that now you could address me in this way with a sad song



As the hole in my heart grows wider and deeper by the second

I know it cannot be mended because there is nothing to beckon

Me from the pit in which my body writhes so from the stake

You have driven thru my heart to attach me to bottom of lake



- tristram

5:27pm Wednesday Dec. 17th, 1997