Subject: The New Choice
From: Christopher W. Thomas (
Date: Mon Dec 14, 1998 at 9:27AM

Recently, the dog just stopped ...

Eating the food for which I've shopped
For quite a few long years now ...
Causing furrows on my brow

So a week or so back ...
I decided to try new stacks
Picking up one of each flavor
Of the gourmet two-for-a-buck saver

The first she didn't care for ...
So only fifty cents went out the door
But the other one she lapped up
Proving she was one hungry pup

Who really had not lost her appetite
(Something which always gives me a fright)
So yesterday I bought half a dozen more
Of the two-for-a-buck special at the store

All of them - the same flavor she'd liked
But the first she sniffed, then took a hike
Leaving me now quite at my wit's end ...
Not knowing how to use the little left to spend

Does it go on another fruitless exercise ...
Or do I return to the old standbys ... ???
... The food she used to eat by the score
Pedigree Chicken and Beef ... but no more

Or do I make one more attempt at the new choice
The one for which she promptly sounded her voice
It's called Sensational Gourmet Chunky Beef ...
... For which she'd been willing to turn a new leaf

Or do I give them both up and return to pet food stores
Where the food costs almost a buck a can, sometimes more
But which seems to be just as fruitless on the whole ...
For half the time, she doesn't eat that ... it just sits in the bowl

There has to be a simple answer to this problem, pressing
Knowing what ... baffles, and really keeps me guessing
She's probably tried now virtually everything in both stores
... Both the pet stores ... and the supermarkets galore ...

All over at least four of the counties in this very state ...
And at least three in the neighboring one ... but, of late
There seems to be no store with dog food which appetizes
What we need is a dog-food taster, so there's no surprises

And then we could promptly avoid all of the pitfalls ...
And no more money would be wasted - as a rule
For one single person would use their own voice ...
So we consumers wouldn't have to make a new choice

- Tristram

(c) Christopher W. Thomas
8:35am Monday, Dec. 14th, 1998